Corban - Thinking about change

The night I knew I needed help

Corban reveals how he used to lash out in relationships and how he hit rock bottom one night when he ended up in a Police cell. That was the night he realised he needed help and wanted to change.

Soft piano music plays continuously in the background for the duration of the film. On a black screen is the text ‘Warning. This video contains discussions of violence. Viewer discretion is advised.'

Corban, a young man in a white t shirt, in a mixed martial arts gym. He is wrapping his hands in yellow boxing tape. Cut to a close up of his hands.

Cut to a close up of Corban, sitting in a warmly lit living room, facing the camera and talking to someone off screen. To his right is a round, white table. On the table is a leafy green plant in a big yellow pot, and a large candle is burning in a glass container. Behind him, the curtains are drawn. He is wearing a black cap with a Boston Red Sox logo, and a casual, checkered shirt with a plain t-shirt underneath it.

Corban: “Kia ora. I am Corban Shane Mita, and I'm from the Wairarapa, and I'm aged 24.” He smiles.

Cut to a wider shot of Corban sitting outside him home, on the steps of a deck. He is wearing a black top, black shorts and work boots.  There is a dog kennel in the background. White text on the screen says ‘Thinking about change’.

Cut back to Corban in the living room.

Corban: “There was a lot of, I'd say, emotional abuse and stuff throughout my childhood.”

Cut to Corban in the gym, wearing a white sports shirt. His hands are behind his head and he is sweating.

Corban: “Alcohol was quite a big thing and drugs and stuff like that I've got a very big family with dominant men around”

Cut back to Corban in the living room.

Corban: “and it was, sort of like what it is to be a man, but yeah, a leader that, you know, Be the man of the house.”

Cut to Corban in the boxing gym training with an older man who is wearing pads. Corban is wearing black boxing gloves.

Corban: “… and all this. I didn't know how to express my emotions, I didn't know how to be vulnerable.”

Cut back to Corban in the living room.

Corban: “I just remember when I used to lash out. Afterwards you'd feel guilty, like you know”

Cut to Corban in the gym, standing with his hands by his sides.

Corban: “You'd be like, 'oh I shouldn't have said that.'  Like, name calling was a bad thing for me, and sort of putting the blame on other people.”

Cut to a close up of Corban's face, in the gym. The scene is in slow motion. A bead of sweat falls from his left temple. He blinks.

Corban: “I started to notice some change when I met Ella, comparing from my previous relationship to now…”

Cut back to Corban in the living room.

Corban: “… thinking like ‘oh is it is it me?’ I'm still acting the same as I was, 'cos I thought it was her … at the time. It was just a night that I just went. It was just a rage - it's just a big rage. I … had a fight at the pub and got taken home. I was already you know at a ‘ten’ and Ella and I got home and it just … really hurts to think about it and it was just something that I'm not proud of. I ended up spending the night in the prison cell and  waking up on New Year's Day. That's when I noticed I … needed  some help and I wasn't happy 'cos I was just always struggling with…”

Cut to Corban, in slow motion, training in the boxing gym. He has yellow tape on his hands. He is punching at his coach, who is out of shot.

Corban: “'I don't want to be like my father', … my real dad and I was just one step closer to being like him, you know?

Cut to a black and white photo of Corban, shirtless, in boxing gloves. His arms are poised to punch, and his mouth is open.

The screen fades to black.